Sexy no Jutsu backfired
by Brianne M.Y
Summary: When Naruto runs into Itachi and Kisame, Naruto is willing to do just about anything to stay alive, even if It means using the move disgraceful jutsu ever known to man kind...though it doesn't go as plan when is doesn't affect Itachi. WHat's a boy to do?


**Devon: ok I reaaaaallllyyyy should be finishing Confessions of a vampire but the need to write an Itachi and Naruto fanfiction is driving me up the wall! So for now I'm stalling to write this!**

**Sasuke: You even admitted it to.**

**Devon: yeah...so?**

**Itachi: your...oddness interest me.**

**Devon: oh? Really?**

**Itachi:...**

**Devon:...and you call me weird.**

**Itachi...:**

**Devon: Find then ignore me! Ok I read a fanfiction and that's how I got this idea so...**

**Sasuke: You steal other peoples Ideas.**

**Devon: I do not!...well maybe but it was such a good plot! Ok in this Sasuke never did run off with Naruto**

**Summary: two Akatsuki members ran into Naruto (I'm pretty sure you know who). Naruto runs and as a last minute defense against he uses the one move he if famous for. But the move back fired what is a Blonde boy to do?**

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'Why me? Why is it always me!' A clash of orange and black shot out from tree to tree. Dodging branches, other trees and any other objects that so happened to get in his way. Why did this happen to him? He didn't do anything wrong? Well, maybe it was that one time he snuck into the Chuunin office and booby trapped the whole place. Or maybe it was the time he put fake crap in an old ladies mail boxs or...

Let's get back to the topic. It was never his intention to run for his life. He didn't know that he would happen to meet up with Itachi and Kisame, He was just out for some air. He was tired and wanted to sleep under a tree or something. To bad Itachi had to show up. It was weird and very unexpected to say.

He had been resting under a tree, taking a 'cat nap' as Sakura said. Then again Naruto's appearance had become more feline then manly. His hair was, well a complete mess. Spikier then before. The yellow trenches fell over his headband as it spiked up at the top. When he was still dating Neji, Neji had commented that it looked like 'sex hair'. His eyes had become slightly purple mixed with his peacock blue. The whisker like scars on his cheeks became very noticeable.

It was true to the world that Naruto was gay. He didn't mind it. To him dating a male was a lot better then dating a female. Women tended to be a lot less fragile. They wanted you to take them out to the most expensive place they could find just to eat. They took you on long shopping sprees to bankrupt you. Which is why Naruto had decided to take up dating man. He'd dated Neji first, there relationship only lasted about three months before naruto decided to call it quiets. Neji had surprisingly took it better then he'd thought. But then again he hooked up with Rock Lee three weeks afterwards.

Let's get back to topic before are minds wonder somewhere else again. Naruto was cat napping under a full bloom Sakura tree, curled up like a cat sleeping against the trunk. It was the beginning of spring. A time that Naruto took off each year to enjoy and relax. He was fifteen and became a juunin at fourteen. Sasuke was an Anbu captain. Sakura stayed a Chuunin when all three had pasted the exam. Sense then Naruto performed duties for the Kokage most of the time. Next year he was prepared to take on a genin team. It was then that he felt a presence.

As I was saying Naruto felt a presence, two actually. At first he thought nothing of it. Probably a Juunin coming to get him for missing out on another meeting. But when the presence made there way slowly, and the fact just as they were about to enter the clearing their Chakra disappeared. Naruto snapped his eyes open and sat up. He froze on the spot.

The Familiar black cloak with red clouds entered his vision. The black inky hair of the Eldest Uchiha son and the large sword and his carrier with blue skin entered his line of vision. He stood up, taking three steps back as both Akatsuki members step forward.

"Good evening Naruto kun," as usual his voice was motionless, completely blacken like his eyes. Kisame stood, smirking in a way that told Naruto that he was indeed enjoying his fear. Thought Naruto wasn't showing fear for himself, he was fearing for the village. If Itachi wanted, he could destroy it. Which was something Naruto was planning not to let him do. Naruto turned around and ran fast from the village. Fleeing from tree to tree.

At first Naruto thought they didn't fallow him but when a Kunai zoomed pasted his shoulder (most likely to pin him to a tree) Naruto ran faster. Both of them hid their Charkra still. Biting his lip Naruto used his 'shadow clone Jutsu' (Devon: I don't give a fuck whatever or not it's in English and not Japanese so don't bitch about it). Four Naruto clones appeared, all four went in different directions. Though it wouldn't last for long, it probably wouldn't even work at all considering Itachi's Sharingan. Itachi could find him faster. Which is what they did when Kisame suddenly appear it front of him in a clearing he was passing through. He turned around to go the other way but Itachi stood in his path.

Both missing nins cornered him near a cliff. Naruto had no way out. Either he jumped and tested his luck to see if he could survive or he could get captured.

"You can't run anywhere, Naruto Kun," Itachi spoke. Naruto twitched his eyes on how emotionless Itachi be. No facial expressions and no emotion in his voice whatsoever. He didn't even smirk for gods sakes.

"Can't we just cut his legs off? It would make are mission so much easier," Kisame murmured low. Naruto looked absolutely terrified at that comment. He stepped back, Itachi and Kisame stepped forward. Naruto stopped when he felt his foot touch the edge of the cliff.

There was no place he could go, no place to run. Nothing but a cliff was jagged rocks at the bottom that could tare his flesh apart. Naruto thought back to everything in his life. The hatred, the loneliness of always being singled out. Everything from the time to he was born ran threw his head as Itachi and Kisame came closer.

When Naruto was younger, he never had someone to die for. No one, no one to notice him. No one to talk to. But then there's Iruka, and Sakura, and Kakashi. And maybe Sasuke. Naruto knew he wasn't going to die, not here not now. His racked his mind to find an answer.

It was then that his memories for pranking people came flooding back into his mind. Rumbling around hid thick head, Naruto eyes lit up. So maybe what he was about to do may not be the best corse of action but Naruto was willing to do just about anything to survive.

Naruto smirked as he planned out he events of what was about to happen. Kisame looked at Naruto confused, probably wondering why he wasn't shitting himself, Itachi looked with interest.

"Sexy no Jutsu!" Naruto called out. Smoke covered him and Kisame and Itachi brought there arms up to cover their eyes. When the smoke clear Kisame's eyes bulged out. Their standing at the height of 5'2 stood a naked blonde headed girl. Long slanted legs with small feet and ankles. Big hips with a narrow waist connecting to long arms with fragile hands and finger tips. Around the bust area two large rounded globes that covered the nipple section by a white fluffy cloud. the face of the young lady was round with three scar like markings on each cheek. Big round blue eyes blinked with long lashes, her lips were pink with a pout. Two ponytails on the side of her head held long blonde hair that reached to her waist.

"Kisame kun!" The women called out, walking over she swung her hips in a attractive fashion, wrapping her long arms around Kisame the women pushed her body up to Kisame's, making sure that he can feel every curve of her body. Blinking up to him she snuggled her head into his chest. It didn't take long before Kisame had a massive nose bleed and fainted.

Naruto turned to Itachi, blinking with innocent eyes she put a finger to her lips. Itachi stood motionless in his spot, almost as if not even noticing his fallowing partner. He didn't seem to be interested in the female version of Naruto.

'Dammit! What is he! Gay!' Naruto thought, Smirking inside he put on the most innocent smile he could muster up and walked over. Giggling he moved his arms about Itachi, giggling and moving against his body. Itachi didn't make a move.

"You think such a thing as nudity will catch me off guard?" Naruto froze, staying in his position against Itachi. He her a deep rumbling in Itachi's chest. His (her) mouth gapped open once he figured out that he was chuckling.

'Oh my god...is he CHUCKLING!' Naruto thought and 'eeped' when Itachi wrapped his arms around his (her...) Mid section. Naruto started panicking but froze in confusion when Itachi laid his chin on his (her) head.

"A women's skin is soft and fragile, women have narrower hips then males. For such a disgraceful jutsu I have to say you've perfected a women's body perfectly." Naruto almost screamed out loud. First it looked like he was about to kill him, then he complements him? What the hell what the hell is he up to? He chuckled again and took Naruto's face in his palm, pushing Naruto's face up to meet his eyes. On Itachi's face was a very small smile, faint andprobably couldn't even be called a smile but none the less it was a smile.

Naruto gasped and froze when Itachi leaned down and captured his pink lips. Naruto struggled put when Itachi tighten his arms around him tighter, warning him Naruto stay remaining slack and unresponsive to Itachi's treatment. But when Itachi started moving his lips against him Naruto had a hard time trying to ignore the feeling. But soon he found himself kissing back.

Naruto's Jutsu wore off and Naruto found himself back in his boy form, but Itachi didn't seem notice or didn't even care that he was kissing a boy. Itachi pushed his tongue into Naruto's mouth, making sure to dual his tongue before moaning into the kiss.

Eventually both had to part away, Naruto's lips were bruised ang he was panting harshly from the treatment of Itachi's roughness. Letting Naruto go he walked over to a fallen Kisame, picking him up Itachi started to leave.

"Askatsuki members never work alone," Was Itachi's last words before departing. Naruto stay where he was, touching his lips softly Naruto blushed as he got up and made his way back to the village.

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**Devon: There done dammit!**

**Itachi:...**

**Naruto:...**

**Devon: yeah yeah stop giving me the cold shoulder please review! This is my first attempt at Itachi/Naruto!**


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